"ring by spring"

It seems like everything anyone is talking about lately is relationships and dating.  [Heads up, this blog is probably going to be very scattered.] Here is the reality of the situation: I am in my second year of college and I have never been on a date. I know nothing about dating or relationships. Not because I don't want to, but just because I have no experience whatsoever.   Today, as my friends were once again talking about relationships, my friend Chadley said this: 

You're not ready to be in a relationship until your willing not to be in a relationship.

Sometimes I feel like the normal is sort of different for me.  And this phrase has been really stuck to me lately - I was not made for the ordinary.  But then, what does that mean in this context?  

Is it any different for someone who has never been in a relationship?  I'm completely okay with not being in a relationship in this moment.  I still have growing up to do.  However, I was thinking about what if I never get married.  Because the Lord has put a fire in my heart for the prostitutes and trafficked in India.  What if the Lord wants me to give my whole life to that?  And surrender the idea of having a husband and children.  I don't think this is the case, but if it is, I want to at least experience what it is like to have a boyfriend.    

I would like to think that the Lord has kept me so pure and unheartbroken, so He could bring a pure and unheartbroken guy into my life to romance me and we could model the love of Jesus and His church.  However, that could just be me being a hopeless romantic.  I like this idea the best.  I know the Lord has kept me pure for a reason.  And I don't mean just sexually pure, I mean completely pure in heart.  I praise God that He has created me to be this.  As ignorant as it may make me seem sometimes, I adore my purity.  I don't need a ring on my finger proclaiming that I'm "waiting."  Pure is just what the Lord created me to be.  Although in saying that, I must also face the fact that I am extremely fearful of having my heartbroken.  My friend Sarah told me that she thinks every girl should experience heartbreak because you learn so much through it.  Maybe that is true, but I honestly hope that I am enough out of the ordinary that I don't need to have my heart broken.  

But here is the reality.  

I'm nineteen.  

I'm a sophomore in college.

I don't need to know.  

God is sovereign.  

He has a perfect plan for my life.  

He wants me sanctified.  

So here I stand, as a 19 year old chasing after her Bridegroom.  I am not content with not being in a relationship.  But as our relationship deepens, I will be content with being married to the Prince of Peace, Son of the King of Kings. 

Adam Young (Owl City) said this:

"She is out there. My cinderella.  She is real.  She exists.  I pray for her constantly.  May God satisfy the desires of her heart, draw her close, consume her.  May he claim her passions, her identity, her refuge, her hopes, her strengths and weaknesses, every fiber of her being. May she treasure and cherish her Savior more than anything of this world and cling to His will with every ounce of her stamina. By all that she is, does, and strives to be, may He draw near to her and she to Him."  

 I stand trusting that my earthly prince will one day come.