lub dup, lub dup, lub dup...

My heart beats for the nations. I always knew I loved the children of the world, but Haiti really revealed to me that I quite literally can not survive without being able to love on the people who are enveloped by injustice and don't know the love of the Father. It's like I'm not truly alive until there is a pile of children on my lap. It's like in Matthew 10:39,

"Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." I think it's when I'm overseas and have lost my "life," comforts, normalcy, etc; it's then that I find His life for me.

Kim Walker sings a song called, "Can I Have

More of You?

" One verse says: "God I need You right next to me for my heart to be satisfied." My heart is completely satisfied with children in my arms. I believe God is next to me in those moments. It's as if Jesus is sitting in my lap. He's that close to me. His hands touch my face and He gazes into my eyes. Maybe physically it appears to be a little child, but for me spiritually, it's Jesus.

While I was in Haiti, I wrote this in a letter to one of my best friends':

"As I walked back to see the tents that they sleep in [the children at an orphanage], a sweet little boy took me by the hand. It's moments like that, that I

live for. They would just wrap their arms around me, so hungry for love, and I'm so lovesick to give it to them. You know, sometimes I feel like I suck at the theological crap, but gosh has the Lord taught me to love. I may be lousy at meeting with the Lord sometimes, but holding those kids, it's like wrapping my arms around Jesus. There is nothing like it. You're like enveloped with peace and love and hope. It's so beautiful..."

I breathe in and out Holy Spirit.

My DNA screams Jesus.

The blood running through my veins knows the blood that dripped down the Cross.

But my heart, my heart beats for the nations.

wet kisses

Haiti is a tragedy.

And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them.
Mark 10:16

Today I ditched my pharmacy team to snatch up some sad looking Haitian kids. Before I knew it, two hours had gone by and I had about eight kids piled up all around me, hanging on my neck, playing with my hair, pulling at my skin, gabbing to me in a language I can't understand, giving me the utter feeling of complete and perfect happiness. You may say, Casey, you're not experiencing perfect happiness, you're not in heaven. But Jesus loved kids. And I love Jesus. And I want to be like Jesus. I want to do what Jesus did. Jesus put kids on His lap and held them. I'm sure Jesus was happy in that moment. But that's beside the point.

Jesus layed hands on the kids in His lap and blessed them. This morning I prayed that I would do what Jesus did, speak what Jesus spoke, hear what Jesus heard, walk where Jesus walked, etc. While sitting with my gorgeous Haitian sweeties, the Lord told me to pray for them. Bronchitis was probably one of the most common illnesses in children today at the clinic, and I getting bronchitis several times a year, know exactly what it feels like. Several of the girls on my lap where coughing pretty bad. I could hear the weezes and the phelm. I put my hands on the lungs of one girl as she sat on my leg. As the other girls played with my hair, I began to ask the Lord to heal this little one. I authentically just talked to the Lord about her and about her sweet little lungs. After probably 5 or 10 minutes, she just began to smile... Her arms wrapped around my neck, and the kid didn't leave my side for the next hour. She just grinned and loved on me. Wet kisses from my Haitian princess. (He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap; he seats them with princes of their people. Psalm 113:7-8).

No, she didn't tell me her chest stopped hurting. No, she didn't say that she could breathe better. But that smile was enough. That smile told it all; answered any question I could ever have.

And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them.
Mark 10:16