In Christ Alone

I'm sitting on the ledge of a building on a huge teen challenge compound in India. It's extremely hot and humid. I'm literally dripping sweat and I'm just sitting here. But just to tell you how faithful my Papa is, I just said to Him, man I wish there was more of a breeze and immediately the wind starting blowing. My Father is good.  Here is a picture of where I am sitting as I write this (I don't have internet, so I probably wrote it several days before you are actually reading it).

Today has been a good day.  This morning I lead a devotional to former prostitutes who are either young Christians or unsaved.  I shared with them a little of my testimony and told them how they see me as pure, when they are in Christ, He sees them as pure.  It was really early in the morning and sort of hard to give the message with the translator.  I'm not sure if any of them really got what I was trying to say, but I know Holy Spirit will lead them into the truth they needed to receive from my words.

After that, I went to breakfast, ate a roll and chai, then dashed back to the girls dorms to teach a class. I've taught people stuff before, particularly in my HLTH and COMS classes back at Liberty, but this was the first time I've ever been the real teacher, teaching a real class, with a really important message. Class was one hour long. This time my translator was the sweetest girl that I sat with at dinner last night. She is seriously precious. She's 21 and has been with BTC for 12 or 13 years, since she was very young. It makes me so sad to know that if she's at Ashagram that means she has worked on “the strip” selling her body...  Which would make her 7 years old when she was “working.”  Heartbreaking. Her name is Anu. I'm really excited to get close to her. 

Anyways, Anu was my amazing translator. I made her laugh a lot. I'm not used to teaching, let alone teaching through a translator. I know I told all of you that I would be teaching health classes, and I will, but this class is actually a teen challenge class that everyone at Ashagram is required to go through. They have to go through this class and get a certificate before they can even get baptized. Baptism is a big deal here. But that is besides the point.  The book I am teaching is called Successful Christian Living. Chapter One is called “Who Am I?” All the sweet girls and ladies in my class were new believers. I think the youngest in my class was 13 years old. There were a couple older ladies, but most of them were in their teens. Teens rescued out of prostitution. Teens choosing to live for Jesus. They were all so beautiful. Since Anu was my translator, I got to get really interactive with them.  I had them tell me what people call them or what they call themselves.  I got answers like “fat,” “gorilla,” one girl was called “platform” because she has a big, flat nose. It was great to get them thinking and talking.  I wrote these words down on a dry erase board.  Then I would mark one out and say, “You are not _____, you are ______.”  Telling them who they are in Christ: God's child, Christ's friend, loved, purchased, free, growing, etc.  I had them read the scripture that went with each promise of God in Hindi. It was seriously so cool.  Almost makes me want to be a women's ministry major... well not really, but I am loving teaching this class.  I'm so excited to keep teaching it over the next few weeks and really get to know these girls. 

That has been today so far.  Yesterday was not so lovely.  I'm not going to go into great detail, but I was under a major attack from the enemy.  Lately when I can't sleep, the Lord has really been speaking loudly to me in the middle of the night.  So at like 1AM I typed on my ipod, “I think this may be the first time that I have ever understood myself to be actively falling in love with Love. I've said that I love Love many times, but I think that I am truly experiencing real joy for the first time in my life, because I am loving so much and really living love, in tern, experiencing real love. I have realized that you can't fall in love with Love without loving. Haha, I loveee joy.”  Maybe that doesn't make since to you, maybe that spoke volumes to you, but for me, it's these late night revelations that are keeping me faithful when the spiritual warfare is strong. 

Please keep praying for me. Pray for my girls. A big prayer request is that on Sunday I think I'm going to be playing Revelation Song on guitar in front of the church while my group sings it...  And well I'm just trusting God to get me better at guitar before then.  I borrowed a guitar to try to learn the song.

Shoutout to my guitar playing friends... Check out my attempt at a makeshift capo.

I have found ...

"For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say." -Luke 12:12

I didn't have many expectations for this trip would be like.  I would rather be surprised than disappointed.  That isn't the greatest attitude to have, but mine was that.  I did however have expectations of what this trip would not be.  Again, probably a pretty bad idea. 

I did not expect for my spiritual vision to change.  It did.

I did not expect for Holy Spirit to completely guide my tongue.  He has.

I did not expect to have such peace about everything.  I have.

I did not expect to finally start believing that I'm beautiful. I am.

I did not expect to be brave and bold. Jesus is.

I did not expect to want to spend all my time with the teenagers. I do.

I did not expect for my thoughts to be taken captive. They are.

I did not expect for so much joy. It's here.

There are much more things than that.  Things that I was not expecting but are happening. 

Holy Spirit is moving so beautifully and changing me so peacefully. 

Before I left the country I told my friends that God had to be planning something great for India because the spiritual warfare prior to leaving was so intense and horrible.  I said that over and over again to friends, but I didn't believe it for myself.  I figured I would get to India and hate it after all these years of dreaming about the calling I felt God placed in my heart about this country.  I figured I would loathe it and be miserable.  I figured I would not be able to breathe and have lots of asthma attacks.  I figured I wouldn't be able to connect with anyone.  I figured the worst.

God is doing great things in me.  I love India.  As in, I have fallen completely head over heels in love with this nation.  I feel confirmation that I am supposed to move here after graduating.  I have had a hard time breathing and had to use my inhaler several times more than I would like to admit, but Jesus is hardcore healing my inside, so I trust that healing to my body will come shortly. I have connected with so many people. 

I walked through the red-light district with about 12 girls from the children's shelter.  I got ahead of the rest of my team because a sweet 15 year old named Esther had my hand. Esther told me about her family and begged me to pray over her. I got to write her a letter and pray over her.  I know the Lord touched her and will continue too.  She has great thirst for the Lord.

I got to be a part of a church service infilling new believers with Holy Spirit.  I got to lay hands on these newly baptize believers and pray that Jesus would fill them.  It was incredible.

I got to pray over 5 vibrant, teenage, lovers of Jesus at Jubilee 1 today.  Jubilee 1 is for 13-20 year olds who are the daughters of prostitutes.  The girls I prayed over (Prity, Sumi, Haseena, Sonu, & Jaya) are shining brighter than any other 15-17 year olds that I have ever seen.  These girls love Jesus and their actions scream it from the rooftops.  I got to pray for them and their families.  They prayed for me.  Sonu let me play her guitar and I taught them Set a Fire by United Pursuit Band.  It was so encouraging and just amazing.

One of the Ashagram boys, Roy, shared his testimony of being healed of tuberculosis and having a relationship with Jesus because of what BTC did for him.

Jesus is doing huge things in my life.  Let me leave you with these Kim Walker lyrics that just sum up the reality of what I have found. 

I have found a peace that plows on through the storm

I have found a joy that jumps over sadness.

I have found a love that lights up every room.

I have found; I've found You.

You are all I want, You are all I need; everything my heart could hope for.

We are longing for the glory of the Lord because we know there's so much more.

I have found a trust that teaches how to rest.

I have found a grace that guides me back again.

I have found a strength that stands like a mountain.

I have found; I've found you.

You are all I want, You are all I need; everything my heart could hope for.

We are longing for the glory of the Lord because we know there's so much more.

India; when darkness meets light

Disclaimer: I tried to start writing a blog last night, but I fell asleep.  I'm going to go ahead and post what I started writing then, but know that the time frame mentioned in the post is as if I was posting last night (on a side note I'm 9.5 hours ahead of home).

India; I have only been here 24 hours and I already have countless stories that I could tell you. India is dirty, beautiful, smelly, colorful, chaotic, etc. More than any of those things though, India is dark. The darkness is apparent anywhere you are, whether the hotel breakfast lounge or the red-light district. That being said, Bombay Teen Challenge gives off light like I have never seen any other ministry radiate love. These people have given everything in their lives to loving God and loving their neighbors, and let me tell you, they LOVE in action.  

There are over 100,000 prostitutes in Mumbai. Falkland Road is the largest red-light district in Mumbai. BTC has planted 8 or 9 house churches on Falkland Road. Kamathipura is the second largest red-light district in Mumbai.  BTC has planted 6 or 7 house churches in Kamathipura.

BTC has a free dental clinic and a free medical clinic in Kamithipura.  They have free meal feeding program on a big bus that they can drive around.  Every day they go feed hungry people in a different part of Mumbai.

In Kamathipura they also have a children's shelter. All the kids in the shelter are the children of sex workers; one child actually was working "the line" before she was taken by BTC. This shelter is a place the kids can live while BTC tries to convince the mother that the child would be safer if they moved to Ashagram (where I'm going on Sunday) or at a Jubilee home. These places are out of the city, far from the districts, taking the risk of them becoming sex workers away. 

I got to visit all of these areas today. The light that BTC radiates in unbelievable. I'm going to take a quick moment to expound upon the darkness in the red-light districts, just so you can understand what I'm experiencing, but then we'll focus back in on the Light.  

I walked through Kamathipura after dark … after the prostitutes were out. I think I now know what hell looks, smells, feels, and sounds like. We weren't supposed to be there after dark, but we got carried away loving on and playing with the kids at the children's home. The street was too narrow for the car to come all the way to where we were, so we had to walk some. There are 7 other ladies on my team.  We all had someone's hand and stuck close together. There were BTC people with us, so we were safe, but it was still scary. The darkness is thick. Once we got in the cars, we drove through Kamathipura and then to Falkland Rd. We passed one part of the district that was rows of cage brothels. Sex slaves never let out of their cages. Like hamsters, except they are human beings that my Papa created in His image. We drove past another part that was all boy sex workers. As we drove through the districts, I gazed into the eyes of these women. Several made eye contact with me. I saw the same thing in each of their eyes; hopelessness. Their eyes were empty, painful, hopeless. The Spirit groaned within me. I felt Proverbs 31:8-9 and Isaiah 58 rise up within me. Open your mouth…for the rights of all who are destitute. Defend the rights of the poor and the needy. Let the oppressed go free. Pour yourself out for the hungry. I prayed and prayed and couldn't stop praying. The Spirit prayed and groaned and cried out within me.

So far in India, I have seen dark and light. The darkness made me realize how bright the light really is. A few months ago the Lord showed me that you don't really notice an individual light in a room that is already completely lit. For example if there were 100 lightbulbs lit in a room, and turned one of them off, the room would not become dark. I am generally surrounded by thousands of other Christians at Liberty University. The Lord was like, "Casey, you need to light the darkness, not be light in a room that is already shining bright." Here I am; thousands of miles from home, shining bright in extreme darkness.  

Philippians 2:14-18 says, "Do all things without grumbling or disputing; so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world, holding fast the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I will have reason to glory because I did not run in vain nor toil in vain. But even if I am being poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrifice and service of your faith, I rejoice and share my joy with you all. You too, I urge you, rejoice in the same way and share your joy with me."


Oh and here is a video I took of the kids at the shelter singing and dancing to a Hindi worship song.  :)

Pre-India (TOMORROW!)

For ANM (Advancing Native Missions) I am supposed to write a brief synopsis of pre-India, while in India, and post-India paragraph.  I figured I'd post it on here since I have now given this blog to people who know I'm going to India.  

I am excited, I am nervous, I am still in the stage where it hasn't occurred to me that I'm going to India tomorrow.  I feel like when you're going on a big trip that you have been preparing for over a period of months, reality doesn't check in until you're on an airplane.  I am expecting big things for this trip.  How can I not when I have a big God?  I have been so beaten down by spiritual warfare lately that I know God has to move hardcore in the darkness of Mumbai.  I am stoked to speak life and love over people in India, whether they be Bombay Teen Challenge employees/volunteers, prostitutes, little children, AIDS victims, my own team members.  I am ready to be in India.  In 2009, knowing I would one day stand in India, I wrote this prayer:

Jesus have your way with India. My dreams belong wholly to you my King. I am Yours Beloved. You love your children in India and I love that I get to serve you. You Father, are going to change me in to such a new daughter after getting the opportunity to literally wash your feet, hold you, feed you, bathe you, massage your aching body, clean the pus from your wounds, love you Jesus.

I leave you, and the country with Matthew 25:34-40: “Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father,inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’ Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’

This book ...

... is completely changing my life, shattering my paradigms, crushing lies, proclaiming truth, giving me the keys to living a John 17:13 lifestyle.  

holyspirit, hitchhikers, & healing

Yesterday my friend gave me a word about how when she looks at me she sees me as bold, strong, confident, and assured.  I do not see myself as that usually.  I should because that is who I am in Christ, but I haven't been.  Today I was having a rough, self-loathing day.

As I left church, for some reason I went the long back way instead of the short way.  As I drove around a curve, there were two people walking in the lane I was driving in.  I was on a two lane road and a car was coming in the other lane, so I had to completely stop my car [mumbling angry remarks under my breath] before the lady noticed there was a car behind her.  As she and the man moved to the side off of the road, for some reason, I rolled down my window and asked them if they were okay or needed anything.  

You need to understand, I was alone.  I WOULD NEVER PICK UP HITCHHIKERS BY MYSELF.  Yet I found myself unlocking the doors and telling this man and woman to get in my car.  

Larry and Victoria.

They were probably in their 50s.  Engaged.  Had a lot of health problems.  Victoria had had a seizure that morning.  Larry had been in a car accident recently, which is why they were walking to town, not driving.  

I drove them to a gas station.  I asked them if I could pray for them.  They said, "Yes please!"  I turned around and grabbed Victoria's hand as she sat in the backseat of my Ford Focus and I began to pray.  Commanding healing, praying blessings, following the Holy Spirit.  After I said amen, Victoria looked at me with a tear-stained face and said, "Woah, you really have the Spirit in you. Everything you prayed...wow."  

She didn't get out of the car and jump up and down saying she had no pain in her knees.  But I believe the Lord healed her.  

I know her and Larry both had a love encounter with the Holy Spirit.  Her tears made that very apparent. 

I got majorly encouraged and edified.  The word was true, I am bold, strong, confident, and assured.  I am that, because I have Holy Spirit inside me.  Without Holy Spirit, I got nothin' but with Him, wow...  

Holiness & Love

Under the Old Covenant, only certain people could touch “holy things.”  Whoever the priests (who were holy) touched, would become holy.  I’m reading through the Old Testament and am currently in Numbers.  I just read a passage that said, “Kohath shall come to carry these, but they must not touch the holy things, lest they die.” (Numbers 4:15). Reading the OT has really shown me the magnitude of Jesus’ death and resurrection and how it literally changed everything.  Under the Old Covenant, most people, even among the Israelites, where not seen by God as holy.  However, under the New Covenant, in Christ we are always seen as holy because Christ is holy and we are in Him.  

There is a shelf above where my head rests on my pillow when I am laying in bed.  On the bottom of this shelf, the last time I was home from college, I wrote “There is nothing you can do to make God love you anymore than He already does.  There is also nothing you can do to make Him love you any less.”  This may seem confusing or not like a big deal, but think about it.  He isn’t going to love me more because already loves me perfectly. He isn’t going to love me less because Jesus died to take away my sins once and for all and Love counts no record of wrong.  So no matter how many times I tell Jesus I love Him, but then spit in His face, He still loves me just as much as when I read the entire books of Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and Song of Songs in one night.  No matter if I pray for 24 hours and do a 40 day liquid only fast, He’s not going to love me any more than when I said mean things to my mom.  He loves me perfectly and there is nothing I can do to change that.